Having recently written the songs cycles CON ÐƯỜNG CÁI QUAN and MẸ VIỆT NAM, works of greater magnitude than the usual song form, as well as the operettas CHỨC NỮ VỀ TRỜI (CHỨC NỮ Returns To Heaven) and TẤM CÁM with librettos by Năm Châu, which I wrote for the Mỹ Vân film studios in 1963, I turned to the song cycle form again to express my views.
I invented the use of a series of ten songs around a theme for MƯỜI BÀI TÂM CA (Ten Songs Of The Heart), a form which would be carried on with MƯỜI BÀI BÌNH CA (Ten Songs Of Peace), MƯỜI BÀI BÉ CA (Ten Song Of Childhood), MƯỜI BÀI NỮ CA (Ten Songs Of Womanhood), MƯỜI BÀI TỤC CA (Ten Profane Songs), MƯỜI BÀI ÐẠO CA (Ten Songs Of The Tao), etc. NGỤC CA (Songs From The Prison), from the poems of Nguyễn Chí Thiện, would consist of twenty pieces. I was partly inspired by Hoàng Ðạo 's book MƯỜI ÐIỀU TÂM NIỆM (Ten Tenets). TÂM CA could also be seen as moral precepts in musical form.
Leading to these ten songs about the crumbling society of that time, I wrote a personal lament:
TÔI CÒN YÊU TÔI CỨ YÊU
AM LOVING STILL, I WILL LOVE ALWAYS
(Saigon-1964)
I am loving still, I will love always!
I am loving still, I will love always!
I will love for ever
I will love the world, I will love people
I will love myself!
Even when I have died
Even when somebody has killed me
Even when bones are stacked into hills
Even when rivers are colored with blood
And hatred continues.
Yes, I still love!
I still carry many modest dreams.
The way to paradise is lost
Heavenly music is silent
Angels have fallen, golden wings shattered
Yes! I still love.
By the cold and deserted brook
Tears may rise and fall
Flooding the world
Shadowy ghosts may be calling
I am loving still, I will love always!
I am loving still, I will love always!
For divine light to fill the world
Undoing hatred, so love ascends the throne.
O love! I try to keep you alive
Waiting for a day when my womb opens
And you will become a fresh wind
That comes into the world
In the long night
And peole will again love people.
I am loving still, I will love always!
I am loving still, I will love always!
I will love for ever
I will love the world, I will love people
I will love somebody!
Even when people run away from me
Even when people reproach me
Even when people have found a substitute
For broken love
I'll still love
Yes, I still love!
I'll always remember the skinny figure
The long flowing hair
Eyes that entrance like the evening's fragrance
The smile that enraptures a lover's soul
Yes! I still love.
I'll always remember the sweet lips
The beautiful embrace
Now just a dying fragrance
A fading dream that comes and goes
I am loving still, I will love always!
I am loving still, I will love always!
I will love for ever
Tomorrow when I leave this world
I'll still love somebody
Please lend your ear
To my soul in the light of dawn
In the young wind, in the night
In the incessant rain
Loving, always loving
I am loving still, I will love always!
I am loving still, I will love always!
The language in the new songs also had to be different, incorporating some of the language of Thiền (Zen) which influenced everbody at that time.
I DREAM
Poem by Nhất Hạnh - music by Phạm Duy
(Saigon-1965)
This morning when I woke up
I heard you had fallen in the battlefield
But in my garden
The uncaring eglantine
Still gave another bloom.
I still live! I still eat! And I still breathe
I still live! I still eat! And I still breathe
But when will I
Be able to speak
The things I have dreamed of?
When will I
When will I
Be able to speak
Be able to speak
The things I have dreamed of
The things I have dreamed of...
From a poem by Nhat Hanh, adaptation by Pham Duy
English lyrics by Steve Ađiss
Six o'clock, when I wake
A friend brings me the news
My brother is killed.
Now he lies slain, and yet
By this house, by this wall
A flower blooms.
I, I still breathe, I still eat, I still live
How shall I speak, how shall I say
All I hope for my land ?
All I hope for Viet Nam ?
How shall I speak, how can I say
All that I hope, all that I pray
For my home, for my land ?
Some how I must say
All I hope for Viet Nam.
LOUDLY SINGING
(Saigon-1965)
I will sing louder than the sound of guns on the old ricefields
But rice plants, don't worry about the words I'll sing.
My words will replace the whizzing of bullets,
My words will steady the ploughman's hands,
Every night my words will chase away the nightmares.
Gentle words that will bring peaceful sleep.
I will sing to ease the burden of hardships and tears
In a countryside peopled with shrivelled hearts
My songs will patch up broken loves
Yesterday my words patched up the Road (1)
Today my words echo Mother's sorrowful voice (2)
Tomorrow my words will scale the peaks of Trường Sơn (3).
I will sing louder than the voices stoking the flames of hatred
My songs will echo like springs in the autumn wood
When the fire has long smouldered
And the homeland is hoarse with crying
My songs are like a miraculous water
Turning into rain to soothe pain.
My songs, my songs will chase away the terror
When springs have pass and youth has gone
My songs are a kiss on your old cheeks.
If you are in love then keep loving
Let no one steal your love.
I will sing louder than the child on the roadside,
Lost child wandering in the garden
When they ask you say you had parents
When they ask you say you had grandparents
When they ask you say you had a house
Then one day you lost them all.
I will cry louder than a child looking for a smile
Little child, little child, come close to me
Like you I have my hands
And my lips sing a begging song.
We shall share some rice
And sleep by the river or rest against a bush.
I shall cry for the girl sold into prostitution
Walking one rainy evening in the muddy alley.
You left your village for the city's bright lights
Your dark past you try to cover
With make-up night after night
A few lines of poetry for you I sing.
My words like strands of hair seeking company
Among the soft bed and gayly colored linen
A mirror broken long ago
Still clearly shows your face.
I will sing louder than the band in the nightclub
Where a singer renowned yet voiceless
Is intoning a love song
That sounds like a gay madness or a false complaint
A voice reeking of flesh rather than music.
Has she lost her voice or has a string broken?
I want to take over for the hungry street band
Trying their luck at a village market.
I will replace the old voiceless male lead
Playing a soldier who followed the heroine
To kill bandits and flatterers
And cheering for the virtuous old man.
I will loudly sing, but not as loud as everybody else
One day, one day
When all my people sing of joy
When all my people sing of life
When war is truly over
And all my people live without worry.
I will loudly sing, but not as loud as all the prayers
For love, for caring in eternity.
My words will be gentle as the insects' call
Ringing like the evening peal
Rising like the kite pipe
Deep as the voice of love
Deep as the voice of love...
(1) Con Ðường Cái Quan (The Mandarin Road)
(2) Mẹ Việt Nam (Mother Vietnam)
(3) Trường Ca Trường Sơn (The Trường Sơn song cycle)
TÂM CA NO. 3 takes a new look at the nation. It calls on the people to sit together. The sage, the pure hearted, they meek must sit with the devil, the corrupt and the beast.
SITTING TOGETHER
(Saigon-1965)
Let's sit together, shoulder by shoulder
Let's sit together, hand holding hand
Let's sit together, and tell each other
We must sit together for a lot longer.
Let's sit together in this small world, in this uncertain life
Let's sit by the kindly, and by the killers
Let's sit by the worms and by the tigers
Let's sit together.
Let's sit closer together, oh how strange those eyes
Let's sit closer together, got to know these cheeks, these lips
Let's sit in pairs to complain, to smile
Let's sit to bring some luck to life
Let's sit near the devil and listen to the slick words
Let's sit near the loving and listen to the Buddha
Near the pure hearted, near the thief
Let's sit and grieve and to make wishes
Let's sit together in shared suffering among the violence
Let's sit together in the stormy rain, in the raging fire
Let's sit near the deserted grave, or in the hurried wedding
Let's sit down and share our joys and sufferings
Let's sit among the guns, let's stand among the flowers
Let's wait for the young birds, or for the sound of bombs
Let's sit inside love or inside hatred
Let's sit together.
Let's sit together, all around the Earth
Let's sit together in the past, in the future
Let's sit together for a long time, until two people
Become one in prayer
Let's sit together in a world without good and evil, without joy and sadness
Let's sit together in a world with no fading color
Let's sit together in a world with nothing new or dilapidated
Let's sit in our SELF
Let's sit in our SELF...
GIỌT MƯA TRÊN LÁ
THE RAIN ON THE LEAVES
(Saigon-1965)
The rain on the leaves is an old mother's tear
Falling on her son's cold body.
The rain on the leaves is the tear of joy
Of a young woman whose husband returns from the war.
The rain on the leave is a baby's cry
Greeting the world and bringing a smile to our lips.
The rain on the leaves is an old man's voice
Talking of a love that deepens with age.
The rain on the leaves is the Buddha's voice
Whispering words to heal the hurts of the world.
The rain on the leaves is the infant voice
Of Jesus who came to atone the sins of mankind.
The rain on the leaves is the sobbing sounds
Of man struggling in the chains of fate.
The rain on the leaves is to tell mankind
It must always keep its dream alive.
The rain on the leaves is confused and frantic,
Like someone getting a last chance at love.
The rain on the leaves is surprised and restless
Like someone excited at the coming of first love.
The rain on the leaves is the lonely figures
Of lovers parted for a few hours.
The rain on the leaves is the memory of a distant past
After a lifetime of separation...
The rain on the leaves is the tears of joy
Of the girl whose boy returns from the war.
The rain on the leaves is the bitter tears
When the mother hears her son is no more.
The rain on the leaves is the cry that is torn
From a baby just born as life is begun
The rain on the leaves is an old couple's love
Much greater now than when they were young.
The rain on the leaves is the passionate voice
In a final choice when last love is near.
The rain on the leaves is the voice surprised
As it realizes its first love is here.
The rain on the leaves is the heart's distress
And a loneliness, as life passes by
The rain on the leaves is the last caress
And a tenderness before love can die...
I LEAVE TO YOU
from a poem by Nguyễn Ðắc Xuân
(Saigon-1965)
I leave to you this country of ours
A beautiful country it is
A land once full of glories
Only echoes of which remain.
I leave to you all my shortcomings
A life of hardship
A dilapidated nation's soul.
Life has reached an impasse
But man's heart does not have to hate.
I leave to you the sins of the past
But by loving me, you startle the nation
By loving me, you give love new life
By loving me, you calm the anger
By loving me, you allow pride to rise
I leave to you a divided country
I leave to you a divided people
I leave to you hatred in the name of ideology
Brute force flaunting its strength
I leave to you the innocents' blood
Grass covered tombs
A white veil of mourning
Like a flag fluttering
I leave to you a battlefield.
By loving me, you make the gun sigh
By loving me, you make the fighter planes cry
By loving me, you silence the grenades
By loving me, you make weapons follow the heart.
I leave to you a poor homeland
Even though the soil is fertile.
A hand smelling of rich soil
Has become tainted with grey
I leave to you a heart full of greed
A brightly lit city
Where people fight for a cloud of dust
And tears are shed in the bars
For those suffering at the front
I leave to you hypocrisy and cowardice
But by loving me, you welcome the heritage
By loving me, you contribute your strength
By loving me, you accept the challenge
By loving me, you will find a way out for us.
A DRY TWIG
(Saigon-1965)
A dry twig
A fading leaf
A big pebble
A blade of grass
A dust cloud
Pieces of paper
A raindrop
The world around us so full of delight
Love is in my hand, love is outside
Thousands of worlds by my side
People helping each other in sadness and in joy.
Mossy patches
Trooping ants
A weaving spider
A nest of wasps
A cicada's song
A cricket's voice
Whispering pines
An evening stirring
The world around us so full of delight
Love is in my hand, love is outside
Thousands of worlds by my side
People helping each other in sadness and in joy.
A young shoulder
A shiny head of hair
A dainty ear
A shapely neck
Curved eyelashes
A hot cheek
Clear bright teeth
A slender hand
The world around us so full of delight
Love is in my hand, love is outside
Thousands of worlds by my side
People helping each other in sadness and in joy
The world around us so full of delight.
MY ENNEMY
(Saigon-1965)
My ennemy is not people.
If I kill people who shall I live with?
My ennemy - his name is cruelty
My ennemy - his name is wickedness
His name is hatred
His name is ghost and devil.
My ennemy is not people.
If I kill people who shall I live with?
My ennemy wears his doctrine as a coat
My ennemy plays the freedom card
He has an impressive mask
A basketful of nouns
And seeds of division.
My ennemy is not people.
If I kill people who shall I live with?
O people, I pity your insignificance
O people, I pity your naivety
I pity you who were bought
I pity you who were duped
I pity you and I pity myself.
My ennemy is not another
My ennemy is inside each of us
His name is slander
His name is ignorance
His name is greed
His name is envy
His name is jealousy.
My ennemy is not another
My ennemy is inside each of us
His eyes look around with envy
His head contains arrogance
His heart is empty
His mind is narrow and shrivelled
His dreams are of conquests.
My ennemy is not another
My ennemy is inside each of us
O people I'll love you forever
O people I'll love you all the time
Day and night
I'll hold your hand
My ennemy is not people
If I kill people who shall I live with?
My ennemy is not another
My ennemy is inside each of us.
LULLABY FOR A DYING PERSON
(Saigon-1965)
I sing to a dying man of a dark blue evening sky
I sing of the sun on the hill
I sing with the voice of all creatures' hearts
I sing to the dying man, I sing of love's last gasp
O life full of turmoil, full of joy
Of gentleness, of deceipt, of wakefulness and dreams
Uncertain life, warm and cold
Bright and dark, dragging with sufferings
Sublime death, you come to us all
Always true to your word,
Honest death, you always keep your appointment.
I sing to you who are deep in sleep
Your face so serene
Your soul pure as an infant's
I sing to keep your heart calm and your body peaceful
You who are dying in peace or in war
O life full of turmoil, full of joy
Of gentleness, of deceipt, of wakefulness and dreams
Uncertain life, warm and cold
Bright and dark, dragging on with sufferings
Sublime death, you come to us all
Always true to your word,
Honest death, you always keep your appointment.
I sing to the dying, to one unafraid of death
I sing with the voice of infinity
I sing with the searching eyes of a million stars
I sing to one who has escaped the chains of love
O life full of turmoil, full of joy,
Gentleness, deceipt, wakefulness and dreams
Uncertain life, warm and cold
Bright and dark, dragging on with sufferings
Sublime death, you come to us all
Always true to your word,
Honest death, you always keep your appointment.
CODA
Always keep your appointment
Always keep your appointment
Always keep your appointment.
I KEEP TELLING MYSELF, BUT I WOULDN'T LISTEN
(Saigon-1965)
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
And I am still following the path of my dream
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
Still believing that man's heart is pure
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I am determined to love the honest and the deceitful
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I still try to love when people are deceiving people
That's the way I was born!
That's the way I was born!
If you love me, let me live with passion
If you don't then just kill me!
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I have just fallen in love with life when I realized it's so short
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I have hardly known love when I suspect I don't love enough
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I get attached to people then I miss them
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I wander away then I feel pity for my family
That's the way I was born!
That's the way I was born!
If you love me, let me live with passion
If you don't then just kill me !
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I keep saying things people don't say
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I refuse to be a sheep or a parrot
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I keep singing sad things that people keep to themselves
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I keep singing happy songs to those who have forgotten how to smile
That's the way I was born!
That's the way I was born!
If you love me, let me live with passion
If you don't then just kill me!
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
Standing in the middle of hatred I suspect I am Horace
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I fight the ennemy but I cannot find hatred
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
The sight of ennemy blood only make me sad and I wouldn't drink it
I keep telling myself, but I wouldn't listen
I don't want to mutilate the ennemy's corpse
That's the way I was born!
That's the way I was born!
If you love me, let me live with passion
If you don't then just kill me!
SING WITH ME
(Saigon-1965)
Sing with me in joy and in sadness
Sing with me with a shout or a lament
When life is good we sing in euphoria
When life is sad we sing a lament
But don't be silent like a corpse.
Sing with me a praise or an insult
The world can be round or square or shapeless
But it still need our songs
And we'll still sing in a thousand generations.
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing with me these words I sing today
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing the words of the Vietnamese people.
Sing with me when playing, when working
Sing with me in the crowd or in your room
From the black dusty pavement
From the idyllic green fields
From the ocean, the sound of singing rises
Sing with me to the fragile young riceplant
Sing with me to the short-lived flowers.
When you are saddened by men's destruction
When you are dreaming of a better humanity
If your heart still hopes then you must still sing.
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing with me these words I sing today
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing the words of the Vietnamese people.
Sing with me when you are about to step into the grave
Sing with me when you are yet to be born
When you are falling in love for the first time
When you are entering gentle old age
Sing with me in the depth of your heart
Sing with me in the wide open spaces
Don't just listen to recordings
Don't just let others sing for you
Raise your voice and sing from your heart
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing with me these words I sing today
Sing with me! Sing with me!
Sing the words of the Vietnamese people.
A fading leaf
A big pebble
A blade of grass
A dust cloud
Pieces of paper
A raindrop, a drop of dew...
The world around us so full of delight
Love is in my hand, love is outside
Thousands of worlds by my side
People helping each other in sadness and in joy
The world around us so full of delight
Saigon 15 November 1965
Lá Bối Publishers
After writing TÂM CA, I found it difficult to leave the atmosphere of
these spiritual songs, so I wrote another on death.
WHAT I'LL TAKE WITH ME WHEN I DIE
(Saigon -1966)
On the day I die
On my way to nothingness
My heart full of regrets
What shall I take with me...?
I cannot take with me fame and fortune
I cannot take with me beautiful women and good wine
I cannot take with me luxurious houses
I cannot take with me dream of riches
I would like to take a trusting smile
I would like to take a child's bright eyes
Wide opened eyes looking at the world so new
All trusting, my future fate is with my elder brother.
On the day I die
On my way to nothingness
My heart full of regrets
What shall I take with mẻ
I cannot take with me my power of the moment
I cannot take with me my hero's fame
I cannot take with me a bronze statue, a marble stele
I cannot take with me my golden age
I shall take with me an unfamiliar love
That of two people who love without reservation, without fear
Embracing by the street light, by the bamboo grove
Without a thought they might overstep the bounds of decency.
On the day I die
On my way to nothingness
My heart full of regrets
What shall I take with me?
I cannot take with me many things I hold dear
I cannot take with me fame and fortune
I cannot take with me joy or sadness
I cannot take these and will have to leave them to the world
To the world I offer a few things I've realized
To the world I offer the fate of a man
To those yet to be born into the world
I offer the forgetfulness of one to be reborn
CODA
On the day I die, on my way to the Nirvana
I shall not take anything with me!
On the day I leave the world, full of joy, without regret,
I shall not take anything with me!
When my life is over and death I discover
O what will I choose to take with me?
When shadows fly o'er me as I start my journey
O what will I choose to take with me
I cannot take with me my fame and my fortune
I cannot take with me a loving companion
I cannot take with me the house and garden
I cannot take with me a castle or a canyon
But I shall take with me the smiles and the sorrows
Of children approaching mysterious tomorrows
And I shall take with me the eyes that are glowing
Reflecting uncertainty that comes with their growing.
And so forth and so on when life's breath is all gone
O what will I choose to take with me
When death's date I'm keeping and with Fate I'm sleeping
O what will I choose to take with me
I cannot take with me my power or my glory
I cannot take with me a golmine or quarry
I cannot take with me a bagful of silver
I cannot take with me a mountain or river
But I shall take with me a knowledge of loving
Of having shared moments both tender and moving
And I shall take with me a portion of sadness
To bring to the next life to balance my gladness
As I wander my way down deaths darkened highway
My soul will have nothing beside it
As I take my last look at life's dog-eared scrapbook
My soul will have nothing to hide it.
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